traversefamilypicnic:

iguanamouth:

man who cares about bald eagles have you ever seen a harpy eagle

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or an african crowned eagle

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or the crested eagle

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the little eagle

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the philippine eagle

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black and white hawk eagle

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and the bateleur eagle

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eags

canadianslut:

I don’t use condoms ;)

not because i like to practice unsafe sex but because I never have sex

maquisleader:

It’s a million laughs around the Science Bros

easilyhumored:

but mom, yodeling is my passion

(Source: easilyhumored)

harroldstyle:

IM SO PISSED OFF THAT WE DONT HAVE BALLS ANY MORE
I WANT TO WEAR A HUGE DRESS AND BE COURTED AND DANCE AROUND AND HAVE MY GOWN SWEEP THE FLOOR AND BE ALL ELEGANT AND GRACEFUL WITH GLOVES AND SHIT

BUT NO WE HAVE DUMB HOUSE PARTIES WITH CHEAP BEER AND RED CUPS AND HORNY TEENAGE BOYS WHO PUT THEIR HANDS UP MY SHIRT 

girl: babe come over
boy: I can't I'm having a threesome with an older couple
girl: my parents aren't home
boy: I know

pissyeti:

when someone stops talking to you and youre not sure what you did wrong

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oknope:

can we skip this whole “college” thing and go straight and go to the part where i have a really awesome job and spend all my time traveling?